Men in Uniforms

The UPS man visited our street today. He went to the neighbor's house. Disappointing.

My friend commented that at least I got to look at him, though, and it made me think. Why are UPS men so much more attractive than the FedEx guys? Is it those brown uniforms? Seriously, the brown uniform is a high standard. Not just anyone can wear it. Put that thing on some men and they look like a walking turd. You've gotta have just the right shoulder width and really great legs to pull it off. They don't seem to let any guys with chicken legs don the infamous Brown Bermudas. For real. Is there a standard for that? I mean, does UPS have a required calf measurement for all delivery men?

They should.

I wonder if FedEx gets a lot of applicants who say they failed the UPS leg standards. . . But, it's not only UPS guys in uniform, Firefighters are generally way hotter (pun partially intended) than Police Officers. The Police generally have the reputation of being pudgy round the middle from all those doughnuts, while Firefighters have abs of steel. Is it from sliding down poles and climbing up ladders? Or is it something about those bright yellow jackets?

Does the uniform make the man, or is it the other way around? All I know is that there are no secret stashes of Policemen in the Teacher's cabinets, but there are definitely quite a few floating around of "That Sexy Fireman" who comes to visit every Fall.